"As Long As You've Learned Something Today.. You'd Be A Better Person Tomorrow"
- HSY (Hassan Sheheryar Yaseen)
- HSY (Hassan Sheheryar Yaseen)
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Friday, October 28, 2011
What Hurts Is...
"Its Not The People That Hurt! Its The Expectations Related To Them That Hurt Us.." - Hazrat Ali (May ALLAH be pleased with him)
Love those who care about you, but be strong enough to not expect anything from them. Love yourself, more than you love anyone.
- Maryam!
Love those who care about you, but be strong enough to not expect anything from them. Love yourself, more than you love anyone.
- Maryam!
Thursday, October 27, 2011
The Need Of... Change!
I love blogging. It makes me feel like whatever I have in my heart, I have a whole right to express it my way. No one to judge me, question me, or even argue.
Being someone who is mostly unable to compromise with people, it becomes really hard to take criticism or even pieces of advice sometimes. Blame it on my indoor-lifestyle or may be because for about 5, or so, years I have lived a, sort of, lonely life. Only Maa and dad with me, no close friends (Apart from internet buddies), not much hang outs, just me, my laptop and my own versions of 'Life'.
For a lot of time in my life, being used to do things 'my way' proved helpful. But as I have grown up, and really observed things around me, sometimes, I have seen that my way was exactly the wrong way.
Its been hectic 8-10 months for me. I had some exams that, whether made my life, or would have ruined it. My results were supposed to be out that decided my future. Yes, they pretty much were the 'live or die' sort of results and if I hadn't done well, then, lets just say, I wouldn't be on my laptop right now, having a tin of Mirinda Citrus next to me, with a teddy bear lying beside me. Yeah, my life would have been kind of screwed up if my results were bad. Please, go ahead, be creative with your thoughts, I am a girl.. whats the worst that was going to happen, YO?
Ok, now enough with your creatvity.. So, I passed!
Well, with rather good marks actually. Almost an A+. Still feels like its not happening because all my life, i have been an average student. The best I got, prior to this year, was an A.. back in 6TH grade. May be because the 'need' of studying wasn't ever there. Yes, the need of having something is basically what decides our attitude towards it. No matter how much we believe that we're passionate about something, if we don't need it, the odds of us putting an effort to get it are rather.. zero.
I have been that kind of person, the all-the-time jolly, having fun, enjoying every moment, not giving much "damn" about what comes next. I am still the same, but the difference is, whatever I do 'in the moment', I do keep the circumstances, that might come with it, in my mind. I still enjoy the moments, but being prepared for whatever comes next. I still am jolly, but lets just say, not with everyone, and not every time. I still have fun, but only with certain people, who I actually consider 'fun' and not just a time pass or objects!
Basically, because I felt the "need" of change. Messing up, embarrassing myself constantly, because I just would not accept the fact that I need to change my attitude, my routines, my expressions, or even reactions. Most of the times because the pressure of 'doing the right thing' was absolutely ridiculous enough to ruin my sense of 'whats right and whats wrong.' The whole scenario which was created for me, "You're right, or you're wrong" confused me and eventually, got to my nerves.
One day, I woke up early. Cleaned my room, literally changed the setting. Said my noon prayer (which I had been missing because of my bad sleeping routine). I remembered that one of my very close friends had sent me a picture of his room, and the prayer mat was lying there in his room, as if it was there 24 hours a day. It gave me an idea to keep my prayer mat, unfolded on my carpet, so whenever I look at it, it reminds me of my prayers, and this way, I wont miss them. (Thanks, close friend :D )
I cleaned my room so nicely that it made me feel alive. Opened the windows, changed the sheets, cushions, put my teddy bears on the bed, organized my gadgets, took a deep breath and said to myself, "Its time for a change.."
(all these years, I have been a lazy person who won't care about a clean room or bad sleep or even bad health.. Gosh, I wonder how my parents really tolerated that!!)
A person who slept at 7 AM and woke up at 5 PM.. Waking up at 10 AM and sleeping at 12-01 AM was quite an achievement. I did not get a noble prize for it, sadly, but my mother came to my room that day and said,"Your room looks so fresh, I wanna sit here all day.."
Yes, she is the same mom who tolerated my messed up routines, never asked me to wake up early (due to my migraine) and man, she really did a lot to not let me feel restless.
My migraine was becoming worse, and nothing was helping, so, I made my own diagnosis.
I started sleeping early, enough to keep me calm, because its not easy for me to sleep in the daylight. Started taking tea, doing early and nutritious breakfasts, taking life 'easily' and not stressing out much. Taking walks, doing Yoga, basically, giving a complete 'change' to my lifestyle. And that made me a more patient, healthy person, and if nothing more, than at least it made me someone who would take life seriously, yet enjoy it.
And most of all, It helped me get over my past, and the way I was perceiving every thing around me. I won't say I transformed into someone else, or even compromised myself. But, when I needed to change my lifestyle, I wasn't too shy to accept it. Because things had gone so bad, that I don't even remember what mess ups I made in those 'bad days'. And well, frankly, I don't want to remember. Solely, because they are gone, and I cannot make a difference in them. But what I can, and am able to, do is change myself. Improve my personality, my judgments, my lifestyle, good enough to make me a better person, and strong enough to keep me dignified.
Now, wonder why I am telling you all this? For one simple reason.. If I Can Do It Then.. Hy Reader... YOU CAN DO IT!
There are very minor changes we sometimes need to bring in our lives, our routines, our personalities, and these changes are the ones that make all the difference. If you are more expressive during anger, just try to not talk in that state, and half of your problems would be gone. If you feel too lonely, or broken inside, try to lie down under the stars during these cool weather days some night, and you'd realise.. Life is too beautiful to be wasted in the feeling of loneliness. If you can't find someone to talk to, make a blog, man! And you'll find a lot of people to talk to :D I found you, didn't I? :)
Life is simple, accept your mistakes, it makes things easier for you and the loved ones around you.
Improve yourself, and don't be shy about it.
And once you do, be proud of yourself.. and like me, BRAG ABOUT IT *Cheers* (Yes, that would make you feel like you're the best thing on this planet and as if no one has ever been like you... believe me, it IS true.) No one is like you, you're your very own version! Love yourself, admire yourself!
Be dignified, not egoistic.
Be strong, not arrogant..
Be human, not a Robot :)
Change, when needed. It would make you feel, if not awesome, then at least better! And by the time, you'll learn to be more accepting and positive towards life. Take it easy on yourself.. Life is not something to be wasted on "OMG I am so sad" and all that teen-year dilemmas. Its beautiful, just LIVE IT!
Being someone who is mostly unable to compromise with people, it becomes really hard to take criticism or even pieces of advice sometimes. Blame it on my indoor-lifestyle or may be because for about 5, or so, years I have lived a, sort of, lonely life. Only Maa and dad with me, no close friends (Apart from internet buddies), not much hang outs, just me, my laptop and my own versions of 'Life'.
For a lot of time in my life, being used to do things 'my way' proved helpful. But as I have grown up, and really observed things around me, sometimes, I have seen that my way was exactly the wrong way.
Its been hectic 8-10 months for me. I had some exams that, whether made my life, or would have ruined it. My results were supposed to be out that decided my future. Yes, they pretty much were the 'live or die' sort of results and if I hadn't done well, then, lets just say, I wouldn't be on my laptop right now, having a tin of Mirinda Citrus next to me, with a teddy bear lying beside me. Yeah, my life would have been kind of screwed up if my results were bad. Please, go ahead, be creative with your thoughts, I am a girl.. whats the worst that was going to happen, YO?
Ok, now enough with your creatvity.. So, I passed!
Well, with rather good marks actually. Almost an A+. Still feels like its not happening because all my life, i have been an average student. The best I got, prior to this year, was an A.. back in 6TH grade. May be because the 'need' of studying wasn't ever there. Yes, the need of having something is basically what decides our attitude towards it. No matter how much we believe that we're passionate about something, if we don't need it, the odds of us putting an effort to get it are rather.. zero.
I have been that kind of person, the all-the-time jolly, having fun, enjoying every moment, not giving much "damn" about what comes next. I am still the same, but the difference is, whatever I do 'in the moment', I do keep the circumstances, that might come with it, in my mind. I still enjoy the moments, but being prepared for whatever comes next. I still am jolly, but lets just say, not with everyone, and not every time. I still have fun, but only with certain people, who I actually consider 'fun' and not just a time pass or objects!
Basically, because I felt the "need" of change. Messing up, embarrassing myself constantly, because I just would not accept the fact that I need to change my attitude, my routines, my expressions, or even reactions. Most of the times because the pressure of 'doing the right thing' was absolutely ridiculous enough to ruin my sense of 'whats right and whats wrong.' The whole scenario which was created for me, "You're right, or you're wrong" confused me and eventually, got to my nerves.
One day, I woke up early. Cleaned my room, literally changed the setting. Said my noon prayer (which I had been missing because of my bad sleeping routine). I remembered that one of my very close friends had sent me a picture of his room, and the prayer mat was lying there in his room, as if it was there 24 hours a day. It gave me an idea to keep my prayer mat, unfolded on my carpet, so whenever I look at it, it reminds me of my prayers, and this way, I wont miss them. (Thanks, close friend :D )
I cleaned my room so nicely that it made me feel alive. Opened the windows, changed the sheets, cushions, put my teddy bears on the bed, organized my gadgets, took a deep breath and said to myself, "Its time for a change.."
(all these years, I have been a lazy person who won't care about a clean room or bad sleep or even bad health.. Gosh, I wonder how my parents really tolerated that!!)
A person who slept at 7 AM and woke up at 5 PM.. Waking up at 10 AM and sleeping at 12-01 AM was quite an achievement. I did not get a noble prize for it, sadly, but my mother came to my room that day and said,"Your room looks so fresh, I wanna sit here all day.."
Yes, she is the same mom who tolerated my messed up routines, never asked me to wake up early (due to my migraine) and man, she really did a lot to not let me feel restless.
My migraine was becoming worse, and nothing was helping, so, I made my own diagnosis.
I started sleeping early, enough to keep me calm, because its not easy for me to sleep in the daylight. Started taking tea, doing early and nutritious breakfasts, taking life 'easily' and not stressing out much. Taking walks, doing Yoga, basically, giving a complete 'change' to my lifestyle. And that made me a more patient, healthy person, and if nothing more, than at least it made me someone who would take life seriously, yet enjoy it.
And most of all, It helped me get over my past, and the way I was perceiving every thing around me. I won't say I transformed into someone else, or even compromised myself. But, when I needed to change my lifestyle, I wasn't too shy to accept it. Because things had gone so bad, that I don't even remember what mess ups I made in those 'bad days'. And well, frankly, I don't want to remember. Solely, because they are gone, and I cannot make a difference in them. But what I can, and am able to, do is change myself. Improve my personality, my judgments, my lifestyle, good enough to make me a better person, and strong enough to keep me dignified.
Now, wonder why I am telling you all this? For one simple reason.. If I Can Do It Then.. Hy Reader... YOU CAN DO IT!
There are very minor changes we sometimes need to bring in our lives, our routines, our personalities, and these changes are the ones that make all the difference. If you are more expressive during anger, just try to not talk in that state, and half of your problems would be gone. If you feel too lonely, or broken inside, try to lie down under the stars during these cool weather days some night, and you'd realise.. Life is too beautiful to be wasted in the feeling of loneliness. If you can't find someone to talk to, make a blog, man! And you'll find a lot of people to talk to :D I found you, didn't I? :)
Life is simple, accept your mistakes, it makes things easier for you and the loved ones around you.
Improve yourself, and don't be shy about it.
And once you do, be proud of yourself.. and like me, BRAG ABOUT IT *Cheers* (Yes, that would make you feel like you're the best thing on this planet and as if no one has ever been like you... believe me, it IS true.) No one is like you, you're your very own version! Love yourself, admire yourself!
Be dignified, not egoistic.
Be strong, not arrogant..
Be human, not a Robot :)
Change, when needed. It would make you feel, if not awesome, then at least better! And by the time, you'll learn to be more accepting and positive towards life. Take it easy on yourself.. Life is not something to be wasted on "OMG I am so sad" and all that teen-year dilemmas. Its beautiful, just LIVE IT!
"Happy People Dont Have Everything Best.. They Just Make 'The Best' Out Of Everything.."
- Maryam!
Monday, October 24, 2011
The Good People!
Its been 3 days, a thought has been going through my mind. To write on a topic named as "The Good People".
I wrote about 30-50 lines in different posts, then saved them as drafts because they just did not seem right.
Bloggin' might seem like a very simple way of expressing one's-self. But when you see the views going from 58 to just 8, that's when you start to think,"I gotta post something new.. and decent enough".
But the best thing about blogging is; you dont take have to take dictations or orders from your editor boss! You can just go with the flow of your own inspirations and thoughts, post them, not really thinking if someone would approve it or not. Those who do, you thank them, appreciate them and well, love them! Those who don't, you take the positive criticism and "Calmly" accept, whereas the plain rude trolls and spammers are just simply ignored.
I believe, there is not much difference between Blogging and real life. I might seem like an introvert obsessed with internet and sitting infront of an LCD, but nowadays, who isn't? :)
In blogging life, people visit your address, read your posts, if they understand your language, then they take a second look as well. If they dont, they'd simply just ignore it as "just another piece of writing on just another website..."
But then, there are people who stick to your blog. Who give it a read daily, no matter what. They take time out to visit it, comment on it, even criticize or suggest something to make it look better and improve it. Who become your friends later, or even best friends. And become a part of your blog and life, all together.
Then, there are some silent visitors you see on the "Statistics" of your blog from different countries. Who never comment, but are always present, no matter if its 1 in the morning or 2 in the noon. They hardly ever comment or post a response, but they are your silent supporters who give you a motivation to write more and more.
Stalkers would be quite a suitable word for those people who would go around following you till they find you on facebook or on a fan page of you and write on every status you've ever posted,"Inbox me". Thats not a bad thing, because sometimes they can't help it, unless they are planning to kidnap you!
After that, there are some people who are so charming, they want to take care of things for you, they offer you help in blogging, even 'blog-flirt' with you! The ones I sometimes want to punch in the face, but when I can't, I'll just punch my laptop or mobile and hate myself for makin' a blog. The young immature readers who see the posts as 'story of their life' and pretend to adore the blogger and tell them "they are angels on earth, blah blah" and never ever mean those big words. Gosh, I seriously dont like such members!
And those who come, go and pretend like they never existed. Yes, there are people like this. I saw a country named "Latvia" on my blog statistics, LORD be my sole witness, I did not know this country ever came into being. Well, Geography has never been my favourite class anyway.
Coming back to the point,
I believe, same are the kind of people we find and meet in real life.
The ones, that stick to you, hold on to you no matter how bad things are. They guide you, and instead of doing things for you, they help you do them for yourself. The ones you basically look up to.
Then the ones who silently observe you, admire you or despise you, their choice.
The stalkers, the ones who just wont let you go, no matter how badly you try to avoid them.
The flirts, oh LORD, save me the horror. The ones who, instead of guiding you, pretend to be your saviors and say "Oh dear, i got this!" These people are mostly the reason behind us losing our focus from the really, genuinely nice people.
And the ones you see on streets, malls, and random places, wondering what they do, think, live like, but you never get a chance to meet them.
About that, the other night, I had a chat with my mother about having "friendships" and what kind of people we should be friends, or rather, be close friends with.
My mother had the perfect answer,"As long as the person is your shoulder to lean on, rather than a run-away from your problems, they are your best friend."
I, myself, have started to believe that from among all the people I mentioned above, I'd rather be with the first ones, who guide me through the life, instead of all others.
None of us ever needs an "i'll take care of you" unless we are on bed, with both legs broken, and a hand unable to reach the our head for itching. LORD forbid, that sounds like a weird situation.
But anyhow, the point is; In life, its easy for others to say that they'll take care of you, but once you, actually, are in darkness, its a true fact that even your own shadow leaves you. Not everytime though. Because a candle in darkness is not 'just a phrase'. There comes that one person who is going to stick with you, as your best blog reader. He would tolerate your bad posts, appreciate your good ones, prove his sincerity towards your blog, then when he starts to feel a right over it, he'll guide you on your mistakes. Help you get improve the mistakes in your posts, and make you a better blogger... Or if considered real life, then the person, or people, who make you better than what you were, are your true 'best friends".
And that defines 'goodness' in someone, as in, how they treat you.
Those are "The Good People". The ones who know when you need them, who know their boundaries, and limitations. Who admire you, for who you are, but want you to be more mature and a better person, not because it suits them, but because they want you to have better self esteem and confidence in yourself.
The people who sacrifice, a lot, for your smile and happiness.
The ones, for whom the Oxford dictionary keeps a word; Sincere.
The beautiful people, who know your value, your respect and your honor. And instead of using you for their own good, they keep you in an honorable position in their life.
The good people, who love you, because you are just yourself in front of them.
In life, having someone to tell you,"I'll take care of you.." sounds beautiful.
But having someone to hold you and say,"Look! I know you're upset, but lets see how we can make things better..." is practical implementation to those beautiful lines mentioned previously.
The guides are better than the care-takers, solely because they make you a better person, instead of just changing your present condition or making you feel better. Because the latter ones would make you feel OK temporarily, but once you're done having a conversation with them, you're back to real, ugly life with a true nightmare waiting for you.
Whereas the former ones would help you through the hard journey, and instead of just holding your hand and sympathizing with you, they'll give you a reality check and pieces of advice to get a better result out of the given hardships.
The guides, the "Good People" are the ones we basically need in our life, instead of the "so-called care-takers" who seem temporarily charming, but are the ones we later refer to as "biggest mistake of our lives.."
Simplifying all that I just wrote, I'll just say; its a friendly suggestion to all my blog readers, find your guides. Be it a spiritual one, a practical one, an emotional one, but dont ever look for a refuge.
Because once that refuge is gone, you'll feel shallow and abandoned. But if, lets say, your guides depart, they'll leave you with the feeling of improvement and betterment in yourself, and you'd owe them, for the rest of your life.
Set your priorities when it comes to people. Because as the quotation goes,"Attraction is temporary, Sincerity Is Forever.."
I wrote about 30-50 lines in different posts, then saved them as drafts because they just did not seem right.
Bloggin' might seem like a very simple way of expressing one's-self. But when you see the views going from 58 to just 8, that's when you start to think,"I gotta post something new.. and decent enough".
But the best thing about blogging is; you dont take have to take dictations or orders from your editor boss! You can just go with the flow of your own inspirations and thoughts, post them, not really thinking if someone would approve it or not. Those who do, you thank them, appreciate them and well, love them! Those who don't, you take the positive criticism and "Calmly" accept, whereas the plain rude trolls and spammers are just simply ignored.
I believe, there is not much difference between Blogging and real life. I might seem like an introvert obsessed with internet and sitting infront of an LCD, but nowadays, who isn't? :)
In blogging life, people visit your address, read your posts, if they understand your language, then they take a second look as well. If they dont, they'd simply just ignore it as "just another piece of writing on just another website..."
But then, there are people who stick to your blog. Who give it a read daily, no matter what. They take time out to visit it, comment on it, even criticize or suggest something to make it look better and improve it. Who become your friends later, or even best friends. And become a part of your blog and life, all together.
Then, there are some silent visitors you see on the "Statistics" of your blog from different countries. Who never comment, but are always present, no matter if its 1 in the morning or 2 in the noon. They hardly ever comment or post a response, but they are your silent supporters who give you a motivation to write more and more.
Stalkers would be quite a suitable word for those people who would go around following you till they find you on facebook or on a fan page of you and write on every status you've ever posted,"Inbox me". Thats not a bad thing, because sometimes they can't help it, unless they are planning to kidnap you!
After that, there are some people who are so charming, they want to take care of things for you, they offer you help in blogging, even 'blog-flirt' with you! The ones I sometimes want to punch in the face, but when I can't, I'll just punch my laptop or mobile and hate myself for makin' a blog. The young immature readers who see the posts as 'story of their life' and pretend to adore the blogger and tell them "they are angels on earth, blah blah" and never ever mean those big words. Gosh, I seriously dont like such members!
And those who come, go and pretend like they never existed. Yes, there are people like this. I saw a country named "Latvia" on my blog statistics, LORD be my sole witness, I did not know this country ever came into being. Well, Geography has never been my favourite class anyway.
Coming back to the point,
I believe, same are the kind of people we find and meet in real life.
The ones, that stick to you, hold on to you no matter how bad things are. They guide you, and instead of doing things for you, they help you do them for yourself. The ones you basically look up to.
Then the ones who silently observe you, admire you or despise you, their choice.
The stalkers, the ones who just wont let you go, no matter how badly you try to avoid them.
The flirts, oh LORD, save me the horror. The ones who, instead of guiding you, pretend to be your saviors and say "Oh dear, i got this!" These people are mostly the reason behind us losing our focus from the really, genuinely nice people.
And the ones you see on streets, malls, and random places, wondering what they do, think, live like, but you never get a chance to meet them.
About that, the other night, I had a chat with my mother about having "friendships" and what kind of people we should be friends, or rather, be close friends with.
My mother had the perfect answer,"As long as the person is your shoulder to lean on, rather than a run-away from your problems, they are your best friend."
I, myself, have started to believe that from among all the people I mentioned above, I'd rather be with the first ones, who guide me through the life, instead of all others.
None of us ever needs an "i'll take care of you" unless we are on bed, with both legs broken, and a hand unable to reach the our head for itching. LORD forbid, that sounds like a weird situation.
But anyhow, the point is; In life, its easy for others to say that they'll take care of you, but once you, actually, are in darkness, its a true fact that even your own shadow leaves you. Not everytime though. Because a candle in darkness is not 'just a phrase'. There comes that one person who is going to stick with you, as your best blog reader. He would tolerate your bad posts, appreciate your good ones, prove his sincerity towards your blog, then when he starts to feel a right over it, he'll guide you on your mistakes. Help you get improve the mistakes in your posts, and make you a better blogger... Or if considered real life, then the person, or people, who make you better than what you were, are your true 'best friends".
And that defines 'goodness' in someone, as in, how they treat you.
Those are "The Good People". The ones who know when you need them, who know their boundaries, and limitations. Who admire you, for who you are, but want you to be more mature and a better person, not because it suits them, but because they want you to have better self esteem and confidence in yourself.
The people who sacrifice, a lot, for your smile and happiness.
The ones, for whom the Oxford dictionary keeps a word; Sincere.
The beautiful people, who know your value, your respect and your honor. And instead of using you for their own good, they keep you in an honorable position in their life.
The good people, who love you, because you are just yourself in front of them.
In life, having someone to tell you,"I'll take care of you.." sounds beautiful.
But having someone to hold you and say,"Look! I know you're upset, but lets see how we can make things better..." is practical implementation to those beautiful lines mentioned previously.
The guides are better than the care-takers, solely because they make you a better person, instead of just changing your present condition or making you feel better. Because the latter ones would make you feel OK temporarily, but once you're done having a conversation with them, you're back to real, ugly life with a true nightmare waiting for you.
Whereas the former ones would help you through the hard journey, and instead of just holding your hand and sympathizing with you, they'll give you a reality check and pieces of advice to get a better result out of the given hardships.
The guides, the "Good People" are the ones we basically need in our life, instead of the "so-called care-takers" who seem temporarily charming, but are the ones we later refer to as "biggest mistake of our lives.."
Simplifying all that I just wrote, I'll just say; its a friendly suggestion to all my blog readers, find your guides. Be it a spiritual one, a practical one, an emotional one, but dont ever look for a refuge.
Because once that refuge is gone, you'll feel shallow and abandoned. But if, lets say, your guides depart, they'll leave you with the feeling of improvement and betterment in yourself, and you'd owe them, for the rest of your life.
Set your priorities when it comes to people. Because as the quotation goes,"Attraction is temporary, Sincerity Is Forever.."
"Being with someone who makes you a 'Better Person', has A far more beautiful outcome than being with someone who makes you 'Feel Better', temporarily. Spot the difference before you lose the sincere ones over the attractive ones."
My special, honest, real Thanks to my best friends who guide me through my mistakes, tolerate me, love me for who I am, and never let go of me. May ALLAH, The ALMIGHTY, keep you with me, forever, so that I keep becoming more mature and better in every path of life. And I hope, I can be as sincere as you, till the very end! InshaALLAH!
Really, Thank You :)
- Maryam!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)